Greed
by alixinwonderland123
Summary: If getting all hot n heavy with Sasuke Uchiha wasn't on my list of things to do this week….it is now. A highschool fic AU sasukeXsakura story my first fan fic be gentle tell me what you think R
1. Chapter 1

so this is my first fan fic. I know its full of errors so please be patient with me im still learning. Um review please :D id like to know what people think. Also I don't exactly know where this is going…..i kinda just sat down and started typing to see if I could and then I was like :O I should post it! I always wanted too! Well that's that

.

.

.

.

.

.

Prologue

I know that there HAS to be some rule about the awkward average girl (who has quirks) who gets to fall in love with the guy? There is no way that only happens in 1980s teen flicks. And if it is, then why can't I be in a movie? You would be the right guy. I'd be the best friend you'd fall in love with. In the end we'd be laughing watching the sunset. Fade to black, show the names, play that happy song! I know its Hannah Montana but SHE SINGS THE TRUTH!

Is it so selfish to want that? To find someone who will give me a pity laugh when no one but me laughs at my own joke. Those ones are always golden by the way! To find someone who loves me as much as I love me. Which is A LOT. Is it so selfish and absurd to want to find the mac to my cheese? The beans to my rice? The peanut butter to my jelly? The Derrick to my Meredith! What great hair that man has. Is it selfish to want somebody to want me?

If it is, then I'm one greedy bastard

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

In the beginning…

The good one, that's what they called me. Can you believe that? Trying to make me look like a goody two shoes when I was clearly a trouble maker! Aw who am I kidding? I was a saint. Not only was I a highly religious, heavily sheltered saint. But I was also very, very, VERY naive. I read my bible, started a bible study, and prayed! the whole shebang. In other words I was a nerd. To make it even better, I was a Jesus nerd!

That was my life. I was happy with it too! Did my parents ever once have to worry about me getting pregnant? No! I barely had friends let alone boyfriends. Now that I think about it you don't even need a boyfriend, well that is if you're a floosey. Which is okay too, whatever floats your boat. Anyway my boat was slowly sinking into the depths of that which we call teenage-dom. Like an anchor or Moby dick. He died right? You know what? I was sinking like the titanic! Yeah, but instead of just jack dying, Rose your dying too! What an unfair ending, don't you think?

So, while I was doing my Jesus thang. Being all good and what not, something happened. I know what you're thinking, what could possibly have happen to this young, hormonal, French fry craving, bible loving girl that could possibly change her life forever? HIGH SCHOOL. It's an awful terrifying place, where mean moms and dads send their monster children to. And I loved it.

I was enchanted with this place where no one had to know me. I could be as invisible as…I don't know what's invisible, but I was! I would never have to be known as the good one again! It was a classic disappearance.

"What happened to that one weird girl with the bible?" I overheard a couple of gossipers outside the gym one day.

"Dude, you didn't hear? She got abducted by aliens." and I was gone

Whether it was by alien abduction, demon possession, or sold to an abbey in Mexico, I was gone. No one would ever call me the good one again! I could just be plain old me. Don't get me wrong, my boat was still sinking, but it was sinking alone where no one had to hear or see jack and rose die. This was all good and well my freshman year. No one noticed me among the shadows (I sound like a spy!XD) I could learn things from a far. But that summer another catastrophic event happened. PUBERTY!

NO, I was not a sophomore when I became a lady. I became a lady in the sixth grade. But I became a lady with boobs and a body my sophomore year. One day I just walked out of the house and my shirt was too small and the gals were trying to play pickaboo with my bra. So when I walked into school that first day as a sophomore, I was expecting it to be like always except now I had a wonderful push up bra and some nice skinny jeans that hugged me in all the right places. That's what the lady who sold them to me had said. My naïve-ness has led me to failure yet again.

Everyone was watching me. Except for blind Betty, but she doesn't count because I'm sure if she wasn't blind she would be looking. And you know what? She was kind of looking/staring in my general direction. Awkward. So as I was saying everyone was watching me like I was some alien off the mother ship. And me being the loner I am, I had no idea what to do with myself. Everywhere I scurried people had ogled me! So I went to the one place I knew no one went. The girl's bathroom! I don't care what you say. No one goes in there! It's gross. Oh you might say we use the mirror. Ah no we don't that's what a compact is for. I would rather wait till I got home because let's face it I don't know what happens behind that stall door.

So as I walked into the restroom, I was not expecting someone to be there. I was especially not expecting that someone to be a boy! Of course I did the most mature thing possible. I screamed. I don't know what he was doing but I do believe he craped his pants. Maybe that's why he was staring at me. Or glaring at me? Maybe that was why he was making that god awful face. Well actually it was a really nice face. Black hair, matching eyes, ivory skin too bad he had his pretty face contorted into this bug eyed I'm going to kill you with my emotions face.

As I screamed and thought about this boy's pretty face, pretty boy all the sudden came charging at me! I was pretty quick on my feet, but this boy was like the flash minus the ginger top. He had me on the ground in like a second. That didn't stop my lungs from screaming though. What do you know, a split second after my back side met the bathroom floor, his hand met my mouth and successfully muffled my scream. So what's a terrified girl to do? I did the only logical thing to be done. I licked him.

I don't think he like that too much because he kind of gasped then made this disgusted face and quickly removed his hand from my mouth. As I tried to escape from pretty boy he proceeded to gape at me. He wasn't ashamed to either. You would have thought I killed his puppy. Or ate his last pancake! Now that would have been a true crime! All I did was scream! I was just about to scream again too, when pretty boy's mouth made a noise.

"Stop." Heavens to mergatroid! I think I died and went to heaven, because a voice like that could only exist in heaven.

"Please? I don't want to be caught in the girl's bathroom, on top of a girl. A very cute girl." insert smirk here.

O my god is he flirting?

Okay, stop control yourself. He's just a pretty boy who is flirting with you in an awkward position on the girl's bathroom floor. That's okay, no need for alarm. TOTAL NEED FOR ALARM!

Before my blush could rise, I suddenly became very angry at this boy. Who does he think he is? He attacked me in the girl's bathroom, tried to suffocate me and now he wants to flirt? I don't know what he was thinking I would do, but I'm pretty sure it didn't involve my fist in his face! Next thing I know he screaming on the floor of the bathroom and blood is everywhere!

O my god did I break his face? I only meant to hit him hard enough to get him off me! Oh man I broke him! What to do what to do what to do? Breathe? Right breathe! So I find myself on the floor next to him rubbing his back, telling him to remember his breathing exercises. heee hee hoo hoo. Wrong move.

"I'm not pregnant you idiot, you broke my nose!" he yelled in a cute nasally kind of way. No need for such hostility though. Okay, maybe he has a right to be hostile but so do I! So I yelled back.

"Well you attacked me! What was I supposed to do? And now I'm trying to help my attacker so shut up!" that did the trick.

Once again he was staring at me. Even as I strolled over to the sink grabbed some napkins and ran them under the faucet, his eyes hadn't left me. I squatted down to his level, removed his hand from his bloody nose and began to clean him up. He winced a little as I dabbed. I let out a soft apology. His eyes widened a little bit but quickly returned back to normal. As normal as can be when they stare at you! At least he wasn't staring at me like he was before. This time it was more in aw.

When I finished cleaning him up I inspected my handy work, running my hand over his brow, nose, and jaw. No serious damage. Except maybe his ego, he did get his ass handed to him by a girl. As I retracted my hand from pretty boys face, my eyes caught sight of the most awesome thing ever! Pretty boy had a sexy tattoo where his neck met his shoulder.

Before I could further inspect said tattoo, pretty boy stood up and offered me a hand. With the help of this hand, I stood up feeling a bit dazed. Just as I was about to run a shaky hand through my locks, I noticed that pretty boys hand was still clasped onto mine. It was warm. I hated it.

"Remove your hand please" insert smirk again. You cannot answer an order with a smirk! "I will not hesitate to really break your nose" I threatened. His hand and his damn smirk were gone instantly. Victory! Not for long though because something wonderful happened after that. He spoke again.

"I think we got off on the wrong foot. Let's try this again shall we? Hello my name is sasuke uchiha, It's nice to meet you." And with that he stuck out his hand.

O.o wtf

"uh" I said as I scratched the back of my head and looked at his hand in uncertainty. I know the epitome of cool. Ah what am I thinking? Shake the hand! It was a nice hand, attached to a nice arm that was attached to a nice face. A really nice face! A girl can only be uncertain for so long.

Not all of me seemed to think this was a good idea. The smart side of me that wasn't easily influenced by good looks, tight jeans and a nice smile was telling me to run. Nooooo! Don't look into the light! Don't fall for his dastardly charms! Run away! Finally after what seemed like an eternity of looking back and forth between his hand and his face, I reached out and shook his hand.

"Sakura Haruno, nice to meet you too" damn stupidity always wins.


	2. Chapter 2

**Holy cow! I got a review! I'm so happy! I have never got a review before. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy :D still I have no idea where this is going. I know that the characters seem ooc like Sakura is a little fangirling but I plan on developing her character? You know like that's how she starts off but then along the way she matures and grows all that jazz. Tell me what you think por favor? I'm also thinking that I might switch pov here and there. Sometimes it's good to know what the other person is thinking. Keep in mind; I'm still super new to writing. I have never written anything other than some research papers, poems, and name acronyms for English. So bear with me my grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors. I'm an awful proof reader and mostly rely on spell check or my mother. But my mother doesn't know I write so spell check it is! I can't believe I graduated high school. Lmao**

**I also forgot this last time I do not own naruto.**

**Anyway sorry here is the next chapter**

My god, his hands are so soft! I thought as I shook his hand. It's like a baby's bottom. Not that I go around touching babies bottoms. That would just be weird on all sorts of levels.

As I pondered over all the different possibilities that could lead to the perfect outcome that was his skin, Sasuke stared at me some more. So much for starting over, not that I could blame him I was practically molesting his hand!

This guy just brings out the best in me….not.

Here I am acting a fool and he just lets me! Who does that? He just stares at me. Speaking of which, everyone was staring at me today. WHY? I must have said this out loud because suddenly I had an eargasm. Which could only mean one thing….Sasuke spoke.

"Everyone is staring because you're hot" I think I just bust a roid.

He thinks I'm hot! Not just any kind of hot but the kind with two t's at the end! Insert squeal here. I make extra effort not to actually squeal. That would totally ruin the moment.

"Just kidding, you have a mustache and uni-brow sharpied onto your face" moment ruined.

It took about half a second for me to really process that. His voice was just too aahhh for his own good. But as soon as the venom of his voice wore off, all hell broke loose.

Shoving Sasuke out of the way of the mirror, I hurled myself across the bathroom towards the sink. As soon as my eyes touched my reflection a hatred that I had not known built in me.

"YOU!" I seethed as I turned and glared at him.

Always the innocent one, he just raised his beautifully arched brow, as if it was a response. That is not an answer! That is stupid!

"Why didn't you tell me there was something on my face? I was walking around all morning trying to be ignored. No wonder everyone was staring at me. My face looks like it got into a fight with a sharpie!" I yelled at him.

Any further ranting was cut short when he totally snorted.

Pretty boy full on snorted like a pig. My eyes must be as big as saucers. This is the best day ever. Sure what I had going on was to die for, but this just might cure cancer. Before I knew what was happening, my body was overtaken by a fit of uncontrollable laughter.

As I laughed, I spared a glance at the piggy who went wee wee wee all the way home. He is not laughing. He's not moving or blinking. Is he breathing? Did I kill him again? What the hell!

Just like that it's not so funny anymore. Omg what do I do? Should I try the breathing exercise again? Maybe he's choking! Alls fun and games until someone dies, I think as I hustle towards sasuke.

"BREATHE!" I yell at him "BREATHE!"

Just as I was about to give him the Heimlich he says "That wasn't me." my jaw must have hit the floor.

You cannot be serious! If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck and walks like duck. IT'S A FRIGGEN DUCK! The same principle applies. I think THIS duck swims in de Nile.

"look," I say totally serious" I'm sorry I laughed at you. Pigs have feelings too right?"

Again I couldn't help myself. This was just priceless. Plus this is total payback for not telling me about my face.

"Don't worry Sasuke, I won't tell anyone…." I say with a sincere face.

"I'm not a squealer." not! Ahahahahaha

I think I really hit a nerve with that one. I'm not really sure but I don't think he thinks my joke was funny. Clue number one, his eye is twitching. Clue number two, he's beat red. When I find clue number three, we can go to the thinking chair and solve the mystery.

Now he has this look of pure misery on his face. It makes me want to curl up and die of shame. I just wanted to ruffle him up a little. I think I destroyed him.

"Please don't tell anyone" he begs with big puppy dog eyes. "I'll never live it down"

What am I supposed to say to that? I don't even think I can speak after that! So I just mumble inaudibly, a slur of incomprehensible assurances.

He smiles a mischievous smile and then bolts for the door. He's out the door before I can say anything. Not that I could my mouth is still dry from those puppy dog eyes. What a tool.

As I pull myself together, Sasuke pokes his head through the door. What a surprise. This was getting real old real fast. This was the girl's restroom for a reason!

Filling my lungs with air to yell at him, he suddenly points to my face and says "don't forget to shave your mustache and pluck that eyebrow." My hand immediately moves to cover the atrocious artwork that was my face. Dear god, kill me now!

He smiles at me and disappears behind the door. I dislike that man with a passion.

**Well what did you think? I know its short but writing is hard XD anyway thanks for reading and please review **


	3. Chapter 3

**So I don't understand how people update weekly! They are just amazing it took me like a day to write this on and off but between college courses and just life in general its hard to write. Especially dialogue. I don't want it to sound cheesy and I go back and rewrite things. I applaud you weekly updaters you got chutzpa! Lol I think this chapter is a lil all over but its longer so enjoy XD and review**

Well my life officially sucks….well it sucked before, but that's besides the fact. I went from virtual nobody, to that girl with the face. What the hell does that even mean? It's not like the sharpie marker is actually part of my face! It was conveniently drawn there.

Normally I wouldn't have to worry about such things happening, because normally my older brother isn't here. Normally he attends a military academy in I don't know where because I don't care. Normally does not describe anything my older brother naruto does.

Don't get me wrong I love him to death. It's when he does stuff like this to me that I question that feeling of love for a stomach ulcer or a bowel movement. This used to happen a lot until he pranked the school principle a few years ago. He totally didn't mean to kill him!

It was one of those freak accidents. Naruto put a bunch of dirty magazine photos all over Mr. Sarutobi's office. When Mr. Sarutobi walked in he got a little too excited and just kicked the bucket. After that mom and dad sent naruto to military school to refine the edges and turn him into a real man. Glad to see mom and dad's money didn't go to waste. Add sarcasm here.

Last week naruto came home to do his senior year. I guess he was doing so well they decided he could come home. Mother #%$ing liar! When I get my hands on him I'm going to destroy him! This isn't what I would call an improvement on his behavior. This is crap!

Some people murmuring a desk over pull me out of my thoughts. They are pointing at me and whispering. What exactly is the point of whispering when you are blatantly pointing at me! Reeeeaaaaal discrete. It's not a secret when everyone knows what you're talking about.

"It's that girl with the face."I hear one of them say. Seriously what does that mean!

"Is she new? I have never seen her before. Do you think she was trying to make a statement?"The other one replies. God they are idiots.

After that I just tune them out. It hurts too much to listen to their idiocy any further. So I patiently wait for the bell to ring so I can go to lunch, one of my favorite parts of the day. Not only do I get to eat, I also get to be alone; completely and utterly secluded from anything and anyone that would otherwise bother me.

I shoot out of my seat and out the door as soon as the bell goes off. Practically running towards the cafeteria, I catch a glimpse of blond hair and immediately stop. Naruto. The blond in question sees me too then bolts in the opposite direction. Coward! I don't worry about it for too long. I can get him when we get home. No one will hear his screams there.

Waiting in line in the cafeteria is proving to be more trouble than it's worth. It's not like I still have sharpie on my face! Don't you people have better things to do than look at me! Just ignore them Sakura, soon everything will go back to normal. But before that can happen, cue idiot now.

"Hey, your that girl." if he says with that face so help me god.

"Or should I say dude?"He laughs. "Where is your mustache? I think you look better with it on" before he can laugh again he's shoved to the floor.

O.o what is going on?

"Wh-who did that?" My red faced tormentor sputters.

My response goes like this. I make this god awful noise, sounding somewhere along the lines of gufah. My mouth is open, my eyes are wide and snot may be running down my nose. Once again I just reek of awesome. You know who's there to see it? Sasuke uchiha.

FML!

"Lay off dude." He says calmly. The look in his eyes is absolute. That's all it takes for the idiot to back off. Even I find it hard to argue with him. Not that I would.

As he stumbles away sasuke looks me over then smirks. What the hell? Way to turn it around on yourself. Suddenly you're not the night in shining armor, but the dirt bag that's checking me out.

With a quirk of my brow, I give him the bird and storm off. Take that you…YOU! Thundering down the hall, I make my way towards my secrete spot. Drum roll please… The basement! Dun Dun Dun also known as the bat cave. I guess it's not a secret or a bat cave but a girl can dream cant she!

So conveniently hidden 2 doors down from the teachers' lounge, the bat cave awaits its master. That's me. One would think "preposterous! A layer so close to the teachers' lounge is bound to be found" negative ghost rider. I don't know what the teachers do in there; sex, drugs, beer bong? But I do know that once they have the lounge in sight, that's all that they see.

So what do I do? I pay the crack pot janitor to make me a master key. With said key I sneak in stuff to furnish my little oasis. Over time I accumulate a TV, couch, lights, games, mini fridge, microwave, game consoles, a computer and more. Anything I can get my hands on goes to the bat cave. It is my pride and joy. My legacy.

Students steer clear of the basement too. Thanks to the dungeons and dragons club (nonexistant)who put posters all over the school where the said club would meet every day for a bout of D and D. clever right? The plan did back fire at first, when mouth breather Colin showed up for a meeting. After I gently explained to him that he had to leave he never came back. (death threat)

Plopping myself down on a bean bag I let out a sigh of relief. No more people to bother me. No more drama. Just me myself and…

"hey" HEAVENS TO MERGATROID! I think I shat myself.

Sasuke.

I don't think he got the hint when I gave him the middle finger. I don't think that would even count as a hint. I do believe that is out right saying #$% off. An even better question would be how did he get down here?

"The door was unlocked." MIND READER!

"This is a pretty cool shindig you got going down here."He says admiring my handy work. All I can think about is who still uses the word shindig?

Taking my silence as permission to continue talking he asks. "You did this all on your own?" I just nod my head.

He opens his mouth to talk again but is silenced when I interrupt him.

"Why exactly are you here?" I ask, aggravated that he is invading my bat cave.

He reaches in his back pocket and pulls out a folded piece of paper. He unfolds it and holds up what appears to be one of the dudgeons and dragons posters I made. Then with a charming smile he says "I'm a level 10 dudgeon master. I'm here for the meeting." THE F%$#?

Reaching out to grasp the paper from his hand I ask, "Who gave you that?"

"A guy named Colin was smelling this by the teachers' lounge." He says, swiftly moving the poster out of my reach.

Betrayed by the damn mouth breather!

"Yeah… well….that club got canceled…..soooo….you can leave now."I try and convince as I usher him towards the stairs and out the door. That didn't sound like a lie at all.

Not one to quit easily he digs his heels into the floor and fires back, "Colin says you come down here every day. If there isn't a club then what are you doing?" God damn it Colin. When I'm done here, I'm going to make sure you can't breathe out of your mouth or your nose.

"Fine, you win. This is my place where I can be alone. I only put those posters up to keep people away." finally giving in.

That said I make my way back to the bean bag and slump into it with defeat. A little bit after me sasuke takes up residence in the bean bag next to me. Its quiet and I can hear him breathing. Thank god its not through his mouth.

It's not awkward like you would think. I actually kind of enjoy it. It's like I'm alone but not alone at the same time. Perhaps I could get used to this.

**If anyone has anyfeed back on how I can improve or how you think the story should go that would be awesome if not whatev thanks for stopping by. **

**Deuces **


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is a little bit more serious but I thought it needed a little angst. Life isn't always fun and games. Sometimes when you go poor yourself a bowl of cereal, you find out some one drank all the milk. **** Anyway I hope I don't offend anyone with this chapter. I am a Christian myself **** I know I use some bad words here and there I try not to but the military has just soiled my mouth lol also please don't take offense on how I portray Sakura's dad. He is actually based upon my papo, I love him but he isn't the most forgiving man. Also I put a little steam in here wohoa: D **

**I always forget this. I do not own naruto. **

The days that followed my encounter with sasuke in the bat cave were filled with embarrassing comments and endless jokes on my behalf. Can you believe those bitches are making fun of me? I can't even walk down the hallway without someone trying to harass me. Fake mustaches taped to my back. Shaving cream smeared on my locker. Imagine opening your locker to have an avalanche of razors spill on the floor. THEN to top it all off, getting ISS for 3 days for having all those razors "concealed weapons" on school grounds!

I think god hates me. That is the only conceivable reason why this is happening. Maybe he is punishing me for wearing tight pants. Damn! my mother was right. In my defense, let's see what you choose between an ankle length jean skirt with a turtle neck and jeans! Yeah who's laughing now?

My mom was not laughing when I gave her the note to sign about the 3 days of ISS. When I handed her the note she smiled a proud mommy kind of smile, ready to post it on the refrigerator. Another A+ for sakura…..NOT. When she took a good look at it I think she turned three different colors before settling on a nice pasty green. It's always a good day when you find out you make your mother sick.

After about 10 minutes of gut wrenching silence, my father walked into the kitchen. O boy. My dad was a very strict, unforgiving, self righteous man who to defend his actions went to church every Sunday. He read the bible every day, not that he needed to he knew the bible by heart. He was the bread winner. He was the man of the household whose word was law. In my father's eyes, a woman's opinion meant nothing. We were here to put food on the table every night before he got home. Clean up after him. Then when all the men's needs were taken care of could we tend to ourselves.

My dad was old school.

I was hoping that only my mother would have to see the note. Now that daddy's here confrontation is inevitable. He grabbed the note from my mom, skimmed his eyes across the paper and then looked at me. His eyes bored into me unrelenting and unforgiving. They almost burned. His deep tenor voice shook my body as he told my mother to leave. Now I had to face the wrath of my father alone. Peachy.

Just as he was about to pull out the bible, naruto came rushing in. "Sakura!" he yelled." I heard that those guys put all those razors into your locker! I talked to the principle and he agreed to change your referral. You still have to go to ISS because he wants to give you time to let the incident blow over. You're not in trouble anymore! Isn't it great?" For you it is, I thought. Now I won't pulverize you into a million pieces for causing this reign of terror.

Without saying a word my father just nodded his head at naruto and left the room. Just like that. My god! I almost had a heart attack. When my father gets old and can't even wipe his own butt, guess who is not doing it. I know that sounds harsh. You're probably thinking who would leave a poor old man defenseless like that. I would! It's called a bidet daddy. Maybe it can kiss you're a$# while it's washing it! You seem to enjoy it when people do it.

While I ranted inside my head I failed to notice naruto was talking away. Not even bothering to listen I punched his arm and left the house. Just because I said I wouldn't pulverize him doesn't mean I wouldn't rough him up a little. He deserves a lot more than that little love tap I gave him in there, but he is my brother and even though he makes my life unbearable (sometimes with just his presence alone) he is the only person I got.

My attempt to leave him in my dust was futile. As soon as my feet hit the sidewalk naruto was on my heels. If there was one word that could be used to describe my brother it would be persistent. I could describe him with a few other choice words but I'll leave those out.

"Where are you going?" He asked. Your mommas, how bout you? NO! Don't let your anger get the best of you. Naruto saved you're life in there. Have you ever had to read the entire book of proverbs out loud? He SAVED my life.

I took a second to look over at my brother. He had really filled out. He wasn't the same old goofy looking kid that left. He was a lot taller than me now, at least six foot one. A lot bulkier too, I don't think he had an ounce of fat on him. His blond hair was just short enough to be in regulation. He even had a little stubble going on. All in all he is pretty good looking. What a piece! How come he gets all the good genes?

"You okay?" he asked, concern written all over his face.

I had to think about that for a second. Was I okay? All I wanted to do was coast through high school. Now I was getting thrown out of my boat and drowning in it. Soooo, no I was not okay. I shook my head. He seemed to catch my drift and nodded in return.

We walked in silence until we got to wherever my feet took us. The school. It was kind of spooky at night. Like one of those scary lifetime movies. What if a murderer was out and about doing…MURDEROUS things? I think naruto was thinking the same thing because when I looked over at him he looked like he was going to piss his pants. So I grabbed his arm and led him to the back door. When I produced a key from my pocket, he gave me a look as if to say "who would want to come to school enough to have a key?" I just shrugged and opened the door.

"Okay, what I'm about to show you is to be kept on the DL. Get what I saying homie?" I voiced as we walked through the halls towards the bat cave.

"Holy shiznit sakura! Are you a gangster who is killing people and hiding their bodies in the school?" he screamed.

WTF! NO!

One minute my brother is my hero. Then he says crap like that and I can't believe he knows how to breathe. Seriously where does he come up with this stuff? Maybe he was dropped on his head when he was a baby? GASP I just had an epiphany! It totally makes sense now that he still believes in the tooth fairy!

Since I'm too cool for school and not willing to dignify that statement with an answer, I open the basement door and push naruto in. He starts screaming like a little girl. So to shut him up I turn the light on. He shuts up for about 5 seconds. I smile smugly. My bat cave is so awesome it sends naruto into a stupor.

At least that's what I think till he points to the couch and screams." You have an accomplice!Your going to kill me!" Then he runs out of the basement. Now I'm thinking I'm adopted because there is no way I'm related to that.

Pause.

Accomplice? Getting ready to pull out my earrings and cut a hoe, I take a peek in the direction naruto was pointing. Immediately I recognize the mop of ebony passed out on my couch. It's Sasuke. How the heck did he sleep through Naruto's wimpy girl wails? I'm impressed; it takes true talent to do that. Still, that doesn't tell me why he is there.

Since you know I only do the most logical of things, what I do next shouldn't be a surprise. I sit on him. My butt is now planted firmly on his chest. I only intended to wake him up but MY Word! Is a chest supposed to feel like this? I think as I run my hands down his chest to get a good feel. My butt wasn't sending me all the information I needed.

His chest was warm, sturdy and a nice ivory color. I guess it's safe to say he doesn't get out in the sun much. I could feel his heartbeat under my palm, moving his blood throughout his body, beating in sync with mine. I lay my head down to his sternum and listen to him breathe. I'm in total creeper mode but I don't care. This beautiful creature from hell was lying on my couch, in my basement. That makes him mine too!

Frankly I just couldn't help myself.

His breath fans my cheeks. It smells like big red. I feel like I'm like being seduced by a siren. Only instead of being incredibly ugly, sasuke was incredibly pretty. From were I'm laying I also catch a view of that tattoo. Does he get anymore perfect? Drool. This time when I reach to touch it, the bajeezuz is scared out of me.

"Are you trying to rape me?" sasuke asks.

AH! What do I say? Yes. Maybe? No, no of course not, just trying to cop a feel.

Crap

Crap

Crap

Crap

Cr-oh BINGO!

"You wouldn't believe the size of the bug that was on your shoulder! Ha..ha-ha….ha."I said.

Totally believable.

"Really?"He asked looking at his shoulder. "What did it look like?" the f$# I know! It wasn't even there!

"Uh….big and and and black and uh….big and…..black?" epic fail.

"So it was big and black?"Sasuke questions, while raising his perfectly arched eyebrow.

"No! I mean yes!" Shut up sakura! Just SHUT UP!

I don't think he believes me. What I need is a distraction. Think, think, think, think.

Ping (that's the sound of an idea! Yeah!)

SMACK!

Distraction acquired.

Sakura! Sakura! where are you going now that you bitch slapped sasuke?

I'm going to Disneyland!

The look sasuke gave me could only be described as pwned. So what is my excuse this time?

"I missed." I explained.

Extremely miffed, Sasuke grinds out." Missed what?" you know grinding your teeth is really bad for you. What? You don't care? Oh alright I'll just go then.

"The giant bug Silly! Didn't you see it? It was so…big and black, how could you miss it?" God I'm awesome.

"Let's just say there was a bug on my face." He says. "Did you HAVE to smack me?"

Did I have to smack him? No. did I enjoy smacking him? Yes. Was I going to tell the truth? ABSOLUTELY NOT! So I ignored him. Removing my derriere from Sasuke's chest, I walk over to my bean bags, sit down and close my eyes.

I don't think he has ever been ignored in his life. A normal person would be like; she is ignoring me so I'm going to leave. Sasuke's reaction goes like this. What's happening? I don't understand! The world is ending! Then get all up in my face. So close to my face, I can smell his breath. I want to attack his face with my lips.

I settle for raising my hand as if to smack him. I feel his body flinch against the bean bag. Too soon is he right there in my face again, contaminating the air with his scent. His sweet breath engulfs my nose, teasing me. I sound like a pervert. I have known this boy for a week and all I want to do is have a serious macking session with him.

Can you blame me? I'm a hormonal, teenage girl who has been sexually deprived for sixteen years. If you were alone in a basement with a devastatingly handsome boy, what would you be thinking about? I can guarantee your thoughts are as inappropriate as mine.

DON'T JUDGE ME!

"What is your problem?" sasuke asks.

"What are you talking about?" I reply, not really understanding what he meant. I wasn't the one with the problem. He was.

"I can't figure you out at all! You act like your all interested in me then you hit me or punch me. It's a constant cycle."

Well I wasn't expecting that one. It made me mad that he put me on the spot like that. He had flaws too!

"I only do that because I'm scared!" I yelled. "You're not easy to figure out either! You hang out in the girl's bathroom for one, you sleep in the schools basement and no matter how hard I try to stay away from you, you won't leave me alone!"

Without thinking sasuke yells back. "The only reason I was in the girls bathroom was to get away from everyone! Have you ever had people you hate want to be around you ALL THE TIME? It gets old! I sleep here because I don't have anywhere else to go! The reason I won't leave you alone is because I like you!"

Looking at this boy, one might see just another pretty face but there is so much more. He was a pretty face that liked me! This was something I had no experience in. I am in complete shock. Not knowing what to do, I kind of just gape at him. Taking that as his cue, Sasuke marches across the room and kisses me.

Glad I'm not the only one who wanted to have a serious macking session.

At first he is gentle, softly moving his lips against mine, hands cradling my face. I'm all holy crap, what do I do? I never kissed a boy before! So I do what he does, wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him back. I suddenly realize I would like to get to know this boy more. So why not start with his mouth.

After he gets the desired response from me, Sasuke pushes me back until we hit the couch. My knees buckle and we fall back onto it. I gasp as my back hits and Sasuke takes the chance to slip his tongue in. wow. This is….wow. His hands are everywhere, anywhere he touches goes numb. I'm like pudding in his hands.

Progressively Sasuke starts to become more aggressive. Not in an abusive way, more like there is too much space between me and him. I don't think that is even possible. Not that I was complaining. I am on cloud nine. This was probably the most epic first kiss in the history of kiss.

His kisses are starting to bruise and I need to breathe so I give a little push on his chest. Reluctantly he pulls away from my face and places his head on my chest listening to my heart beat. I am speechless. That was absolutely amazing.

"Wow." Sasuke says in an exhausted tone.

I guess he thought so too. This is all so weird. I hardly know Sasuke but right now it feels like he is all I do know. Then he picks up his head and I'm staring into his inky eyes, waiting for him to say something.

"I'm sorry I forced myself onto you like that." He said sincerely. "I couldn't take it any longer. I wanted to kiss you since we met in the bathroom." I would hardly call that forced. Still he continued. "I thought you were so different when you walked into the bathroom with that stupid mustache drawn on your face. I have never met anyone like you before. It's so….refreshing."

Well call me a cup and fill me with drank. That was unexpected.

"These past few days I have spent trying to impress you. The only thing I seemed to accomplish was making a fool out of myself." He blushed. Who da thunk that lil old me was secretly seducing Sasuke Uchiha without even knowing it. I had no idea my wilely woman skills were so powerful!

Taking my hand in his, sasuke looks me straight in the eye and asks. "You want to go steady?" when was this guy born? He says some of the weirdest things ever.

Sasuke was complicated and mysterious. He was that kitten puzzle I wanted for my 9th birthday. Somewhere underneath the mess of different colored oblong shaped pieces was a cute little kitten dangling from a tree branch with the words, "keep hanging in there!" in bold. I needed to figure him out. I nodded my head and leaned in, sealing the deal with a kiss.

**Do you think I am moving too fast? I probably should have planned this story. I'm trying to put things together give some answers yada yada sasuke is totally ooc in this chapter I know but you know how love makes you all talkative and stuff it will get better I promise! I will be giving answers to his mysteries in the next chapter. Anyway review por favor.**

**dueces**


	5. Chapter 5

**I had no idear that queue was spelled like that! Also thank you ere body for your reviews. I'm so happy it fills my tummy with butterflies :D sorry it took me so long to update. I had drill weekend and had to do all this hoe mer work earlier than it was due. MY SHISTER GOT MARRIED! Gah so much. You know what they say? Excuses are like butt holes, everyone's got one. I'm no exception to that rule. Ha**

**I do not own**

I don't know who made up that lame nursery rhyme about kissing in trees; whoever it was obviously needed to kiss Sasuke. It's nothing to make fun of. I know I don't have a lot of experience in kissing. (I mean that in the loosest of terms; like not at all) but I'm positive it's the most amazing thing ever. Before you judge me, I'd like to say that I was under the influence, the influence of Sasuke.

He had me wrapped around his finger, pulling and tugging at my strings like a puppet. I was like Pinocchio and Sasuke was Gepetto, minus the old and the beard and the wrinkles and the gross factor…you know what, Sasuke was not Gepetto. That's not a mood killer at all.

When I say mood killer, I mean the killing of the mood when you are making out like a couple of horny teenagers in the school basement. Yeah, THAT mood. I think that killing it would be a good thing right now because things were quickly getting out of hand. Sasuke's hand.

One minute I was thinking how amazing Sasuke's lips were and the next minute his hand was up my shirt, doing….things! My first instinct was to use my own hand and bring it across his face. So that's what I did.

Mood effectively killed.

If I had a quarter for every time sasuke got pimp slapped by me, I would be rich. I haven't even known him that long! I have hit him more times than I have kissed him. Maybe he was into that S&M stuff. While imagining sasuke with an assortment of whips and chains, I was interrupted by the man himself, who was still leaning over me.

"What….was that for?" He asks shocked.

Well you kind of just felt me up but hey, my bad, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that right? Like hell there isn't! We barely kissed and you want to play with the gals? I think not pal.

"What the hell do you think it was for, dumb ass?" I yell throwing the worst glare I could muster at him.

Looking a bit frazzled and flustered, sasuke pursed his lips together as if thinking really hard. After about 2 seconds of thought, his face lit up when realization struck him. I beg to differ; I would say stupidity struck him.

"You're into S&M?" he asks all serious.

WTF? HELL NO! You sure seem to be a glutton for punishment though.

"If you are, that's totally cool but please refrains from slapping my face. It's the money maker." He continues.

Before I can yell at him or slap him again, a stream of inquisitive guesses starts to flow from Sasuke's mouth. The keyword is inquisitive.

"Does your back hurt?" Why would I slap you if my back was hurting?

"You think your breath is bad?" well I do now!

"Was there another bug?" he smiles coyly on that one. My brow furrows and he is already asking another question.

"Does your hand have turrets?" Oh my god, really?

"You think you're a bad kisser? I'd give you an 8 out of 10 because you are little inexperienced. If we continue what we started I'm sure by the end of the day we can fix that problem." I wonder if he knows he is only digging his hole deeper.

"Oh! Is it PMS?" I like his mouth I really do, especially when it's on mine but I don't know if I can get past what comes out of it.

I think this relationship was doomed before it even started. Maybe when I punched him in the bathroom on that first day of school, it was a sign from god that if I pursued this, punching him was all I would be doing.

Hushing him, I placed my hand over his mouth. It's time I nip this in the bud.

"Look, I really enjoyed what we had going. But I'm afraid it's about all we had going." I say wiggling my way out from underneath him. While keeping my hand firmly locked over him mouth I continue to talk.

"It's not me, it's you. You are not smart and I don't think my superior intellect can deal with you. I won't blame you if you cry. Men cry too. Well, not manly men but that's okay, you are not a manly man. Just promise me you will move on with your life. Don't worry; I will leave quickly so you can grieve-"my voice leaves me when something wet grazes my palm.

My palm happens to be on Sasuke's mouth which can only mean one thing. THAT BASTARD LICKED ME!

Disgusted by his actions I removed my hand from his face and began the process of wiping my hand on his shirt and yelling words at him that should not be in my vocabulary. Since they are, I will use them without mercy, so mercilessly that I will probably need to wash my own mouth out when I get home.

After I run out of bad words, I storm out of the basement leaving sasuke in a stooper. I run all the way home. As I enter the house naruto is there to interrogate me, poking and prodding at me to make sure I was unharmed by the "killer". Waving him off, I head up to my room.

I was upset. I wanted to eat a box of Girl Scout cookies. Okay, that's a lie I WAS eating a box of Girl Scout cookies. What do you expect me to do? Sure I'm a little kooky but I'm still a sixteen year old girl chalk full of hormones and angst. I HAVE NEEDS TOO! My needs just happen to have 190 calories for every 3 cookies.

When I had had my fill of scrumdillyupcious smoas, I felt hollow still; hard to believe with my belly full as it was. So I decided to blow off some steam. Plugging in my record player, I turned the volume way up, let the record spin, and dropped the needle. Approximately 5 seconds later my room was filled with the sweet, sweet melody of Cher's, "If I could turn back time".

Screaming the lyrics at the top of my lungs into a hair brush, I let out all of my frustrations. I jumped around on my bed, acting out Cher's performance animatedly. Flipping my hair and making my lips do that o thing Cher does; I blew my stuffed animal audience away. I'm so boss.

When the record finished I plopped back down on my bed feeling breathless. If only the whole world knew about the amazing power Cher's music had, it would be a better place. Not only was I feeling carefree but I could just think so much better. It was like all of the sudden I could focus.

So I focused on Sasuke. He was so infuriating. He had so many faces that I didn't know who the real Sasuke was. I don't even think he knows who he is. Here is a little of what I do know.

The son of a business tycoon, Sasuke Uchiha lived in the lap of luxury. Expensive clothes, more expensive gadgets and the most expensive cars. His house was so big it made my house look like a dirt clod. Yeah, one of those compacted dirt clods. It's not a rock and it's not dirt so you can crush it with your hand. I know my house is a crap clod.

Sasuke was a socialite of short. He knew everybody who was anybody also all the little people in between. He was constantly surrounded, mostly by other rich kids of status. He always displayed himself in a gentlemanly manner; opening the doors for girls, polite, funny, charming and good looking. If you wanted to bring someone home to mama he would be the perfect.

He was a little cocky, but if I looked like that I'm sure I would be too. Anything he wanted was at his finger tips. Girls threw themselves at him; he didn't even have to try. He was a natural at all sports and clubs. It kind of made me sick. Why would I kiss that? Okay I already know the answer to that; because he is fricken hot! When had I become so shallow?

Somewhere in between laying on the bean bags and feeling his chest in the basement I think.

I don't sound like a total creeper at all.

Maybe the more important question is why had he kissed me? I wasn't anything special. He said he thought I was different but when had sasuke started liking different? Any girl on his extensive dating record had been extremely good looking and not different.

Was he just saying that to get in my pants? It won't work because I wear granny panties of steel! Seriously though, my mom patented them. Guaranteed to keep penis out!

I just can't seem to wrap my head around all this. Why was there so much complication? We like each other, what's the problem? He was so sincere and sweet and yummy then, out of nowhere he makes a 180 and treats me like one of those girls. I may be new to this but I have standards too!

I don't know what to think anymore. This whole boy situation has got me feeling sleepy. So I close my eyes and I'm unconscious to the world.

The next day at school I have ISS, also known as in school suspension or lame. You sit in a room and do nothing except school work and copying pages out of a dictionary. I brought tabloids; got to catch up with Jon and Kate plus their 8 (billion fights). School? Who needs that when you can have an endless amount of superstar gossip to feed your soul?

I walk in and sit down at a desk, ready to dull my mind with lies and scandals from us weekly, okay, people, and in style. What I was not ready for was someone to snatch my magazines out from under my nose. Things were about to get ugly! Nobody comes in between me and my drama! NOBODY!

Looking up at the perpetrator, my stomach drops. Sasuke is standing in front of my desk, skimming through my magazines. The voice I was about to yell with is suddenly missing and I am left with a stupid look on my face. Not that you weren't expecting that, or is that anything new.

"Huh, I had no idea that Snooki was only 4 foot 9. That is only 2 inches taller that Wee man." He comments.

"What really? I didn't k-hold on a minute!" I say "What are you doing here? This is ISS not the girl's bathroom!"

Like my life would be that easy.

"I know this is not the girl's bathroom." Sasuke whispers.

I blink at him waiting for him to continue. He doesn't continue, matter a fact he just sits himself in the desk next to me…. IGNORING ME!

Dear God,

Please help the children in poverty stricken countries that need food and water.

Oh and also strike down Sasuke uchiha, he is a douche.

If you could make it theatrical that would be great, maybe by lighting?

If you need the spelling you can email me or text.

AMEN

I feel like I got slapped in the face, it kind of hurts. I wonder if this is how sasuke feels. The only difference is that he deserves to be slapped… most of the time.

I mean, look at him sitting there, reading my magazines like he owns the place. He totally deserves a slap in the face right now. Before I know what my hand is doing, it forms a fist and pops sasuke in the back of the head. That works too.

Awwwww, sweet release.

He turns around and glares at me like he doesn't know why I cuffed him.

"Why did you punch me?" He yells rubbing the back of his head.

The hell I know! Because it felt good? Why are you so annoying?

Of course I don't tell him that, so I give him a taste of his own medicine and ignore him. Looking at my finger nails and humming a tune, I blatantly ignore Sasuke's existence. Which works out great, if you think great is sasuke fuming. Lucky for me, I do.

BAHAHAHA

While I am trying to ignore sasuke I fail to notice that I can't completely block him out. I can still hear his sweet voice and its reading my tabloids out loud.

"Lindsay Lohan tested hot for a drug test." NOOOOOOOOO! Don't listen to him!

"Russel Brand was charged with battery by paparazzi" I can't hear you!

"Paris Hilton dodges felony charges for her coke bust"

GASP! I turn and gape at him, waiting for him to continue. I mean WTF if I did that I would have never gotten away -

Damn it all to hell. He got me.

Smiling at me he looks back down at the magazine and continues reading out loud. But this time it was for my enjoyment not torture. Too bad I can't enjoy it because my eyes are clouded by the beauty that is sasuke. How wonderful he looks with a smile on his face.

I had thought I deciphered my feelings for him. But when he smiled at me and his eyes squinted with boyish charm I nearly melted; the cockles of my ice cold heart were defrosting.

HOLY MATRIMONY! I was in like with sasuke! O.o

Interrupting sasuke I asked "Why are you really here?" I didn't want to joke anymore.

Putting the magazine down sasuke looks at me and says. "I beat up those guys who were making fun of you this morning so I would be in ISS with you."

Oh

OH

"I wanted to apologize for what happened yesterday and I knew that this was the only way I would be able to get close to you. I don't mean to come off like a dick. I have never been in a real relationship and I got a bit carried away in the basement. I swear I didn't mean to do that but you are very beautiful and I'm only human. When I get nervous I start to just say stuff and then I licked you and you stormed off and god I am so sorry that I didn't treat you with the respect you deserve. Will you give me another chance to make it up to you?" Sasuke finished gasping for breath.

Suddenly the classroom erupted in applause and cheer. Everyone in the room had heard Sasuke's confession and was hootin and hollerin at me to say yes. I wasn't the only one surprised. Sasuke's face was bright red with blush.

Opening my mouth to respond, my stomach decided to do it for me.

I threw up all over Sasuke's shoes.

O fish sticks.

**Well how did you like it? I'm working on making them longer. Tell me what you think! **


	6. Chapter 6

**I think I'm going to go back to the first like 2 or 3 chapters and redo them, they kinda…suck! Why didn't you tell me! I'm horrible at this game. Sigh. anyway**

**I don't own.**

Dear sweet baby Jesus!

I just threw up.

That would have been okay with me too. I have no problem throwing up thanks to that bulimia stint I pulled in the 7th grade; I just had to be like Lindsay! As you can see my problem isn't throwing up, just the part where I did it ALL OVER SASUKES SHOES.

I might as well have thrown up in his lap! Make that his face! No, his whole body! I threw up all over Sasuke head to toe…..I think I'm going to be sick.

HURL!

Scratch that. I threw up on Sasuke twice.

Feel free to end my life at anytime. Please?

Looking up at Sasuke, I can clearly see the look of mortification on his face. I probably ruined his name brand shoes, his socks, his pants, and my dignity. And I was about to ruin whatever else he had on if I didn't get to a toilet quick.

I high tailed it to the girl's restroom as quickly as my feet would take me. I never thought the porcelain throne looked more beautiful in my life. Now I was going to upchuck in it. Yum. What was wrong with me? Why was I puking everywhere?

Maybe the thought of being with sasuke subconsciously made me sick. Let me test it out.

Sasuke

Sasuke

Sasuke

Looks good I don't think sasuke was maki- and my life is spiraling downwards, both mentally and physically; as in the vomit in the toilet and my vision. As I miserably hurl into the pot, I hear the bathroom door open and footsteps come my way. Oh great this will do wonders for my reputation, not that it could get any worse. I just exploded over boy wonder.

I could feel their eyes on me, staring holes into my back, which could only mean one thing.

"Could you please go away sasuke?" I implored, my face lying on the cold tile; it felt so good but I felt so disgusting. Back splash….oh god I'm going to puke again.

Once again I'm looking into the bottom of the bowl. How horrifying, yesterday I was using these lips to kiss a very pretty face. Today I was using them to project my breakfast into the toilet. To add to it, that very pretty face is watching me do it!

My knight in shining armor walks up behind me and takes hold of my pink locks and brushes them to the side and out of the danger zone, aka my mouth. I catch a glimpse of his feet and notice he has changed into his gym clothes.

His calves look great.

I need help; the psychological kind. Who pukes their brains out then checks out the resident hotties legs?

"I bet that was what Mount Vesuvius looked like when it erupted." He snorted.

Mr. Piggy returns!

If I could laugh without puking through my nose I would have. So I settle for a thumbs up.

"Or mount Saint Helens." He says as he laughs.

Somebody thinks they are Dane Cook today. I don't see what is funny; he just called me a mountain! I give him a thumbs down. He laughs, soft and breezy against my flushed cheeks.

"Do you think you broke a record? Like how far you can puke or something?" he asked.

Thumbs down

I can hear the smile in his voice as he speaks. "I bet you did. You can be in that shiny book with all the weird records in it and I can point you out to all my friends and say 'that's my girl friend'"

Thumbs down…..WAIT! WHAT? Girlfriend?

I froze. He still wants to date me? Even after I went all Mount Saint Helens on him? I pinch him.

"Ow!" He yelps. "What was that for?"

I clear my throat of the bile, cover my mouth with my hand and turn away from the toilet to face him. "You're not real." I say, my hand muffling my voice. He is too perfect. He must be an android from another planet. This particular android came to abduct the most beautiful woman alive and take over the human race with his…..perfectness. Mhm. That's exactly what he is.

What the hell did I smoke this morning?

"I beasted on you then you come into the girls bathroom to hold my hair while a beast some more! You put on the charm and try to make me feel better, I am mean to you and you still want to be with me! I hardly know you and you are willing to go through all that trouble, I just don't get it!"

What am I smoking you ask? What is HE smoking?

He contemplates for a minute then shrugs his shoulders. He doesn't know either or maybe he doesn't understand. I hardly understand what I'm saying. It sounds like I'm drunk! Smooth, real smooth. I turn back to God's gift to me and continue to empty my stomach. Then I feel his hand on my back; rubbing away the sick and soothing my body. It feels so good that I could cry. Like I was saying, smoooooooth.

It feels so good. Sasuke should sell drugs…..or himself. Would that classify him as a prostitute? He would be his own pimp. Perhaps drug dealer is a better term? Maybe a prostitute slash drug dealer! Prostipimp dealer! I don't think a relationship with a drug dealer/prostitute would last very long. If he was promoted to crime boss or drug lord then that might be something worth looking into.

The name is Sasuke Uchiha, DON Sasuke Uchiha.

When the heaving stops I lay my head on Sasuke's lap or maybe it's the toilet, I couldn't possibly tell you. I don't feel so hot. I am extremely disoriented and vulnerable. I have absolutely no idea what is happening or where I am. I don't even know my left from right. I'm a rapist dream come true.

But instead of taking advantage of me, sasuke just runs his hands through my hair and over my back. It's so impossibly cheesy and cliché that I almost can't stomach it. Luckily my stomach is empty so the chances of me hurling again are slim, if anything ill just dry heave. I still feel like I'm drunk.

All of the sudden the toilet starts talking to me.

o.O

WTF!

"I cheated on the bathroom sink with the urinal." He tells me. "She just doesn't get me, you know?"

NO I most certainly do not know.

"We share the same pipes." He says. "She knows what it is like to be bathroomed in. She is experienced."

Why am I listening to you, you are a toilet.

"The urinal is going to have my baby. Sink will flip out when she finds out. What do I do?"

"You are a douche bag!" I slur.

"Actually I'm a toilet." he replies.

I slap the toilet. He needs some sense slapped into him! Why would you cheat on the sink? She is so nice! She washes your hands when they are dirty and stuff. Why? Why would you do that? With the dirty old urinal to boot! Guys go number 1 in that…euw.

Turning my head towards the bathroom door I yell, hoping the urinal hears me. "Urinal, you're a good for nothing home wrecker!"

Turning to Sasuke, who's face is contorted into this 'are you shatting me' expression, I tell him what transpired between me and the toilet. He then lifts an eyebrow, turns to toward the toilet and points his finger at it.

"This toilet?" sasuke asks and I nod my head.

Nodding his head in return, Sasuke stands up and offers me a hand. I wobble to my feet and he lends me his arm for support, I gladly accept it. Walking to the door sasuke stops and puts his finger up, signaling for me to wait a second. He lets go of my arm and heads back to the stall we previously occupied. He turns to me and winks, then with all his might kicks the toilet.

As he kicks the toilet, obscenities fly from his mouth. I continue to stand by the door while making jabs and kicks into an imaginary enemy, encouraging Sasuke to kick the toilets butt. The seat breaks loose and water starts spirting from the toilet.

With one final kick sasuke runs out of the bathroom laughing, taking me with him. We run all the way to his car. Well it's more like he drags me but I don't really mind, it felt like flying. Is this how Kristen Stewart feels when Edwards runs? Must be those calve muscles. Yep.

Leaning over me to buckle me in, I catch a whiff of Sasuke. I was expecting him to smell like Clorox, Kaboom or if I was lucky one of those scented bathroom air fresheners. The ones that claim to smell like fresh sheets or flowers but really when you spray it after someone took a major deuce, it only makes the room smell like flowers and deuces; successfully giving you a head ache and a shitty smelling bathroom.

It should be a crime to smell that good, especially after beating up a toilet. He smells like cologne, I don't know which one nor do I care. It reminded me of a Christmas tree. If it had a name its new one was Sasuke. All I wanted from this day forth was to let his heavenly scent assault my nose. Being high or drunk or whatever the hell was wrong with me, I grabbed sasuke shirt and pulled him towards my face. I buried my face into the crook of his neck and inhaled.

I could feel the burn of his blush radiating off of him. Why is he embarrassed? I'm the one making a fool of myself! He backs out of my grip and raises his brow at me. I shrug, can you really blame me for you smelling positively marvelous. No, that is 100 percent your fault. I wasn't about to let that go either.

Before he can shut the door I push the button to unbuckle my seat belt. I clear my throat and he looks at my seat belt and sighs. Leaning over me he buckles me up again while I breathe him in. This must be what crack is like. I continue to unbuckle my seat until sasuke threatens to put me in a car seat. No matter how cool I think I am, even I can't pull that look off.

Shutting my door and getting in on the driver's side, Sasuke buckles himself in and puts his car in drive. The ride is quite but not awkward. My head was lolling to and fro, talking gibberish to sasuke who doesn't understand me. What I meant was it wasn't awkward for me, I didn't know what the heck was going on. Sasuke was probably feeling awkward as all get out.

We end up parking in front of this monster of a house. When did we drive to Bel Air? Is Will Smith inside? Was this Sasuke's house? Damn! He was loaded. Just as I was about to burst into the theme song and start dancing the Carlton, Sasuke turns toward me and unbuckles my safety belt. He kind of nudges me into the direction of the car door and I lean my head against it. I was so sleepy. I feel sasuke get out and open my door. He catches me before I biff it and helps me into the house.

His arm is wrapped around my lower back sending tingles through my body. It takes us like 15 minute to get to his room, that's how big his house is! Or maybe I just kept stopping and sitting down; I really liked the tingle. Who knows? It was a real old school plantation house with pictures of people from like the Stone Age hanging up and down the halls. They had a library and a winding staircase, like one you can slide all the way down, and those cool busts of people with crazy physical attributes including mustaches and don king hair-doo's. This place was C-L-A-S-S-Y.

Sherlock Holms could live here! I half expected him and Watson to come around the corner smoking one of those bubble pipes. How awesome would that be? Completely and utterly.

He lays me down on his bed which can only be the most comfortable bed ever! A small fortune must have been forfeited in order to make this bed and it was mine, ALL MINE! He then covers me up with a blanket and I find myself drifting off into a peaceful sleep. As I close my eyes I whisper thanks to sasuke hoping he heard me.

When I come to, flip out is not the word I would use to describe my reaction. Conniption would be a more accurate term. I don't really remember all that transpired between me and sasuke after I threw up, except that I talked to someone named Lou who cheated on his lady with a skank? I was more worried about where I was, how I got there and why was I in someone's bed?

Did someone slip me a ruffie?

Was I a rape victim?

Was my V card gone?

Did I enjoy it?

Probably not if I don't remember it.

The reality of the situation settled upon me then. I was drugged for my sexual skills. Plus I was still in his house. Freak out time. I had to get out of here but how. Sketching up an escape plan in my head, I jumped out of bed grabbed the closest thing to me and chucked it at the door.

My plan was simple….and stupid but beggars can't be choosers. I was going to break open the door run through the house throwing whatever I could get my hands on until I was out the front door. I figured guys hate crazies so he will probably let me go.

I know, stroke of genius.

Running out of the bedroom screaming at the top of my lungs, I navigated my way through the house towards the front door-unsuccessfully. How big was this place? I was running out of breath and the door was nowhere in sight. I was also running out of things to chuck-oh wait candle sticks!

Stopping to take a break for like two seconds, I turned around to see if anyone was on to me. Out of the depths of my worst nightmare, sasuke skids to a halt at the end of the hallway. He was raped too? It was probably some escaped prisoner. (They liked pretty boys)

The look in his eyes tells me he wasn't raped. This brings me to the conclusion that he was the raper!

Fury coursing through me, I chuck some giant decorative bowl filled with pine cones that was resting on a mini table in the hall way. It lands close to his feet and he steps back and glares at me.

"What is your problem!" he yells at me.

"All you had to do was put a little effort in and then maybe I would have done the nasty with you! You didn't have to steal it you- you thief!" I yell back while hurling a lamp in his direction.

Sasuke dodges it and comes hurtling towards me. Oh snap. I didn't have a chance. Dropping the mini table I was getting ready to toss, I took off down the hallway as fast as I could. I could hear the patter of our feet against the wood flooring and his were getting louder as he encroached on me.

I look over my shoulder and in this really awesome slow-mo vision, I could see sasuke jump to tackle me. There was no escaping this guy! He grabbed a hold of me and we hit the floor with a thud. He subdues me quickly, an iron grip on my wrists and his body on top of mine to stop me from moving. He lays his head down on my shoulder and sighs in relief.

Bringing his head up to look at me he laughs and says. "Well that was fun but would you like to tell me why you went all crazy and started destroying my house?"

In response I just squirmed. I didn't have anything to say to this guy.

"You thought I raped you?" he questions. NO!...yes.

"I would never do anything to hurt you Sakura. You were only resting in my bed because you got sick at school and I didn't know where you lived. Think about it, your clothes are still on you!"

I stopped squirming.

Oh.

Well that makes so much more sense. Ha—haha—ha-haauuuwa.

I feel like a real jerk. Of course sasuke wouldn't have done anything like that to me. He likes me, or he used to until I wrecked his house and stomped on his character. I was at a loss of words. What do you say to someone you practically spat on?

Hey, sorry I thought you raped me, still pals?

Errrnt!

So I settle for a simple sorry and some good ol puppy dog eyes. Sasuke lets out a sigh and smiles at me. Don't do that, it makes me swoon.

"So I couldn't help but over hear you saying that if I put a little effort into it, we could do the nasty." He says smirking.

Me and my big mouth are going to have to have a little talk.

"Ah-uh- what I meant was- uhhhhh."

Damn it all!

**Read and review I need a pick me. my week sucks **


	7. Chapter 7

**Tons of mistakes and stuff I know. But I tied in some loose ends. XD also I found my inspiration again….I think. Well it's a lot easier to write. Anywho **

**Disclaimer I don't own anything except my crappy writing.**

Dear god, make me a bird so I can fly fa, fa fa away from here.

.

.

.

Damn I should have known. If it didn't work for Jenny in Forest Gump it wasn't going to work for me. I guess I could try running away again. On second thought, the last time I did that sea biscuit over there ran me down faster than a fat kid eats his cake. That only leaves me with one option; dealing with my issues.

Friggen A.

After my little escapade sasuke carried me to a real fancy room and sat me down on the most comfortable couch that has ever graced my cheeks. It had a floral pattern that screamed old lady, but the gold feet and embroidery said RICH old lady. Why did sasuke say he had nowhere to go? From the looks of it he had plenty to go to. I half expected queen Elizabeth to show up and demand that Sasuke return all this fancy crap because he stole it. Alas, Sasuke's family really is that rich and all this expensive stuff is indeed theirs.

Staring at everything but what was in front of me I had hoped to avoid sasuke for as long as possible. Yeah, that worked real well. No matter how hard I try to ignore him, he blatantly doesn't try to ignore me. I feel like I'm in a porno or something. Why else would someone watch something so closely?

I could feel his eyes on me, as I fixed my gaze on the extremely large vases in the corner awkwardly. It was no use. I was melting under the pressure that was Sasuke's beautiful stare. I have to hold on for a little bit longer, or at least until I can find a way out of this mess.

Once the vases got ugly, I let my eyes wander across the room, skipping over the boy in front of me. This place was decked out! Everything was so shiny and pretty if I wasn't so concentrated on avoiding sasuke I might have drooled.

As I continued with my inspection I started to get nervous. I was running out of shiny things to look at. Panic took hold as my eyes darted around the room searching for something to focus on. The seconds ticked by, and my eyes started to wander towards the center of the room. Closer and closer they got to the black hole, the pit of darkness, the Sasuke. Mayday! Mayday! I'm sinking! HEL-gasp!

Jackpot.

Slightly to the right and behind sasuke, who was sitting on a love seat across from me, was a fire place about the size of a small house. More than 1 Santa could come down that chimney. A Santa Claus, his fat Santa wife, all the elves, reindeer, frosty, and at least a dozen of Santa's secrete hookers could fit in there. How I missed it I don't exactly know, but I did know that I was going to use it to escape. If I throw that million dollar tea pot on the coffee table right at his head I could escape through the chimney.

I know I said face my fears, but I lied.

This whole handsome boy liking me thing is hard to believe. Not that it really mattered because I ruined whatever was going on there when I destroyed his house and accused him of rape. It's embarrassing, humiliating, shameful and did I say embarrassing? I was not avoiding Sasuke, not on purpose anyway. It's just that I literally can't look at him, not without dying of humiliation first.

Obviously sasuke wanted me to die because he was absolutely dead set on getting me to make eye contact. I don't blame him but I also don't want to look at him because that would mean death. Maybe I am over exaggerating but I do what I want.

Before I could entirely think my plan through I reached for the tea pot then watched in agony as it slipped through my fingers. How does he do that? My plan or lack thereof, was flawless. Whack him in the head and flee through the chimney….well it works for Santa clause.

You know that sounded a whole lot better a minute ago.

Hanging my head I nodded, signaling my defeat. With said defeat I slouched in the comfy couch and finally raise my eyes to meet Sasuke's. Of course he is looking right at me, or through me, I couldn't possibly tell you which.

"Can I offer you some tea?" He asks while pouring me a cup whether I wanted some or not.

"Do you take cream?"

No

"How about sugar?"

No

"One lump or two?"

God dammit I don't want any tea!

Giving it a little stir with this ridiculously small spoon sasuke brings the cup of tea to his lips and blows on it. Oh how nice, he doesn't want me to burn my tongue-is he winking at me? No, no, no he just got something in his eye.

Taking the cup from his lips sasuke then leans across the table, dangerously close to me, and lifts the cup to my lips. I was so mesmerized that I wasn't paying attention to the cup and it's already too late. The smallest drop of tea has touched my lips and I can't stop myself from licking them.

How can evil exist in a body that makes such heavenly tea? I think as I unconsciously pull the cup back to my lips for another taste of sweet ambrosia. How perfect is this guy? He is so sweet and hot and romantic and man is getting hot in here or what? I think I need to take off my shir-OMG HE IS SO TRYING TO SEDUCE ME!

Using the mouthful of liquid as ammunition, I squirt Sasuke's seduction tea all over his face. No one can blame me I mean can you believe him? Blowing on my tea all sexy like he did and pulling an I don't want you to get burned because I care stunt. I almost took off my shirt! Thank God I only took a sip of his mind control tea. Imagine if I would have drunk the whole thing. You can't trick me you….YOU!

Who the hell am I kidding? He didn't even have to try to get into my pants! I might as well have been taking them off for him! Come on in. There is a party going on just for you…..in my pants…..damn am I really that easy?

All of the sudden I felt really bad. Maybe he wasn't trying to have sex with me. Maybe he was just being a gentleman. How was I supposed to know? I thought chivalry was dead! I also thought that there were wild cows. Hey it's possible! It's just that he is so confusing!

One minute he is a perfect gentleman. The next minute he is winking at me and I mistake him for a womanizing tool. Hey it happens. This whole running in circles thing is stupid. We fight then we kiss then we fight then we kiss, I don't want to fight anymore. Once again this can only be solved one way; face my issues and talk to him or more precisely do what no woman has done before!

Grovel.

Grabbing a pillow from the couch, I grab a hold of Sasuke's soaked face and rub the fancy shmancy pillow all over it to get the tea off. He scrunches up his nose and I dab the pillow instead of rub it. He still has the most beautiful face I ever did see and I would hate to ruin it with a rug burn.

Once he is dry I let go of his face and he opens his eyes. I pat the sofa cushion, silently asking him to take a seat next to me. He eyes me funny as if to say "You got anymore tea in your mouth I don't know about?" I smile and shake my head. Nodding his head sasuke sits down where I patted my hand.

"You know I have never been in a relationship before. Heck no one has ever flirted with me before." I say smiling.

"The only thing I know about romance is what I have seen on TV and movies. My mom says I should never believe what I see on TV, it's the devil. So I'm going to be honest with you, I like you. I am really sorry about this whole day. I'm just really inexperienced and really really retarded. Now if you would please excuse me I would like to leave before I embarrass myself any further."

I pretty much copied Sasuke's little speech from earlier today word for word but I'm a laday and I did my best. Standing up so I could leave I was stopped by Sasuke's hand that has reached out and grabbed mine. He gives it a tiny tug and I'm on the couch again. Before I can say another word sasuke leans forward and kisses me.

At first his lips are like feathers, soft and light against my own, almost as if he was asking me something. It's not like I could answer. Partly because I didn't know what he was asking, also because I was oblivious to anything other than his lips. So instead of thinking about it any further, like most of my plans, I just do. Leaning in I pushed my lips a little harder against his hoping that Sasuke's question, whatever it may be, is answered.

Invite to the party in my pants successfully delivered.

Suddenly I wasn't in Kansas anymore. Suddenly I wasn't on the planet anymore. I was thrust into a most glorious place called cloud nine. No, that is not another name for the back seat of your date's hatchback in the schools parking lot on prom night. Nor is it another name for Sasuke's big comfy couch, although it was big and we were most certainly getting comfy on it.

It's the ultimate high. Maybe. I don't really know what that feels like so that's probably not the best description but it will have to do. I can think of nothing else that can describe cloud nine other than drugs. Actually I couldn't think at all, I didn't care either. All that mattered to me was that sasuke kept kissing me.

It's strange how drugs work though. I had only taken two hits of this drug called sasuke and I was addicted. It didn't matter that I wore that stupid red ribbon for a whole week once a year. It didn't matter that I had never done drugs before. I was addicted and I wanted to buy up all the Sasuke I could get my hands on. Forget about selling it, I am a greedy sonabitch, Sasuke was mine.

All other drugs were nothing in comparison. It was like I was in pain my whole life, popping pez to try and stop it. Had I realized all I needed was a good ol dose of vicoden, I would have taken it in a heartbeat. I was completely consumed. Literally. He was attacking my neck like it was going to get up and run away.

Trust me buddy it's not going anywhere.

"So does this mean… that we are officially….. Going steady?" sasuke asks in between kisses.

I laugh breathlessly. How the hell am I supposed to keep a straight face when he uses a word like that? My laugh is cut short when sasuke focuses on my mouth again. It's another 5 minutes before I can answer.

"Are you asking me?"

Sasuke stops his menstruations, looks at me very seriously and says, "Yes."

Well okey dokey then.

"Then I guess it does." I reply with a smile.

He smiles back and kisses me again. Slowly he starts placing a trail of kisses along my jaw up to my ear. Once he reaches it he whispers, "Good, now make me a samitch."

Awww HELL TO THE NA!

"Just kidding." He says as he laughs into my ear.

o.o

Sasuke continues to laugh as he pulls himself off of me to sit upright on the couch. I too sit up and he still laughs. Normally I would be angry but I find myself ready to join in his laughter. He is so different from when we first met. Not so gloomy, grumpy and quiet. I suppose I have changed as well, at least in his eyes.

I like this person who I have come to know. I like to hear his laugh even though he is making fun of me. It's contagious and funny especially when he snorts. I also don't mind that he has a pretty face. But just because he makes me see stars does not mean I will change. If he wants sakura he is getting the whole package.

Knock Knock.

Hello?

HI! Did somebody order a load of bricks?

Why yes I do believe Sasuke has.

Yanking me out of my stupor is Sasuke's hand gripping mine.

"So there are some rules that come along with being my girl friend." He states

Oh this should be good.

"You and I have to make out at least 1 hour a day."

I could live with that one.

"PDA must always be allowed during school"

Well if you insist.

"You have to wear a super short skirt at least once a week."

Okay that's just stupid.

"Oh and you have to meet my parents"

Woahoehoehoehoe say that again.

"The last one was the only serious one. I was just trying to butter you up by offering you my body before I told you the real condition." Sasuke explains

Oh way to win me over, tease me then don't please me. I am almost eleventy hundred percent sure that that is not how it works. Yeah I made that number up. And what?

"Oh yeah!" I retort, "Well I have some rules too!"

Don't smile at me like you know I'm lying!

Cause I'm sooooo not lying.

They are the best rules ever.

My rules are the beez neez.

My rules rule!

"I can't tell you them though because I want them to be a surprise" clever clever Sakura.

Don't smile at me like you know I'm lying!

Cause I am sooooo not lying.

Looking at me with those powerful, blazing, smoldering, puppy dog eyes, Sasuke asks, "So will you have dinner at my house tomorrow to meet my parents?"

I almost didn't hear what he asked me. No wonder he tried so hard to get me to make eye contact, it was like he was a Jedi. These are not the droids you are look for. These are not the droids we are looking for. Too bad I am also a master Jedi! Ahahahaha! I'm like motha freakin Darth Vader. So of course I used the dark forces to listen to what Obi-wan over there was really saying.

"Oh sorry, looks like rule number one in the Sakura's kick ass rule book says…No meeting Sasuke's parentals. Yup that's what it says."

Don't smile at me like you know I'm lying!

"Why don't you want to meet them?"

"I don't make the rules Sasuke. I just follow and enforce them."

Now assume the position so I can frisk you.

"So I'll pick you up at 8?" he asks although it was a statement more than a question.

Sure you can pick up your dinner date at 8. What do you want to eat for dinner? How about a Knuckle samitch?

He doesn't even give me a chance to answer. He is already getting up off the couch to do something else. He is not even worried that I will object to his demands. Oh yeah, he told me when he was picking me up. Well Sakura don't play like that, she gets hers.

"No." I say.

That stopped him dead in his tracks.

"8 is no good? How about 7 then?" He replies, turning around to face me.

"No."

Damn I can already feel my resolve falter. The force is strong in this one.

"6:30 it is."

"No."

Dear lord that was hard to say.

"Why not?" He inquires.

I have no idea. I'm just trying to get out of this dinner party from hell. Think think think. Maybe if I ate some honey I'll get an idea. That's what good ol pooh bear does and he is one fart smeller I mean smart feller. No time. What do I say? O!

"Well you see, my prostate is inflamed." I explain.

For someone who was raised in church I lie more than a politician.

"That's why I was so sick today." I continue. "It was acting up and instead of peeing I threw up. So I made a doctor's appointment for tomorrow night."

The look on Sasuke's face could be described as disgusted with a dash of your kidding me and a wopping pinch of appalled.

"Yeah when girls get inflamed prostates it's all backwards you know?"

For some odd reason, I don't think he will be coming to the party in my pants anymore.

But that is okay because with my inflamed prostate I don't think I want him there.


	8. Chapter 8

Sasuke is a total man whore.

He bribes me with his body and I do things for him in return. For example, have dinner with his parents. Would that be considered prostitution? If that's the case, then I prefer the word escort. I guess I'm a dirty pervert for accepting his bribes. In my defense his kisses are crack and I'm addicted.

My "drug" problem is exactly the reason why I am sitting at a table with Sasuke's parents. I really think I should consider rehab….or suicide. Looks like its suicide, because there is absolutely no way I am going to rehab. I don't think I would fit in with all the other crazies. I can see it now.

"Thank you tank for sharing that touching story on how your heroin addiction ruined your life, does anyone else want to share?" a woman with a clip board asks. I raise my hand and stand up.

"Hi, my name is Sakura." I say as I take a look around the room.

It's filled with people of all races, women, men, a tranny here and there. There is a pirate in the way back whose name tag reads; HI MY NAME IS oNe EyEd WiLlY. He has this awesome peg leg with flames running down it. I think we could be great friends.

"Hello Sakura." The room chants back.

"I'm here today because…" I don't know if I can say it. I look over to the lady next to me for support. Bad idear; peggi has one eye and it's crossed. Plus she is talking to herself in another language. I think it might be klingon. As if sensing my fear the lady with the clip board tries to encourage me.

"Go on sakura we won't judge you here." She says.

Tearing my eyes off of peggi, I focus my attention back to the task at hand. Now my hands are sweaty and my throat is all dry. I think I'm about to freeze. Now or never sakura.

"My name is Sakura and I'm addicted to Sasuke." I blurt out.

All of the sudden I'm being pelted with various objects. I think ol Willy threw his peg leg at me. What happened to the support system? Where is the love? I thought we had a connection! You just liked me because I brought cupcakes for the snack!

So that's how it would go. I'll be scarred for life and I'll be out a very good pirate friend so….yeah.

Back to reality.

It couldn't possibly be that bad right? Have a little dinner, charm them with my great personality, then leave as fast as I could. That's what I thought before Sasuke's family started to mind shank me with their eyes.

Do I have bats in the cave or something? Why are they looking at me like that? Is there sharpie on my face again? No, that can't be the reason why I'm being assaulted with eyes. Sasuke would have told me….i think…most likely.

Aw shit.

I excuse myself to head to the ladies room for a quick check on my face. It takes me about forever to find one; the size of this house is really ridiculous. I mean how many bedrooms does a house need? Especially for a family of four! I must have opened at least 15 bedroom doors, passed a library, a theater room, a mini bar lounge, a game room, an indoor pool and a small bowling alley before I got to the bathroom. For Christ sakes, there is a small town in these peoples house!

If I keep looking maybe I'll find a Red Lobster. Ooooohhhohohohohooo, how I adore Red Lobster.

I wonder what they do for a living. They must be shitting money or have a money tree. It has to be something crazy like that. What else could provide such an exquisite lifestyle? Maybe sasuke and his family were vampires and he invited me here so they could eat me?

Please Mr. and Mrs. Uchiha, I'm all meat. Hardly any blood in me at all. haha haaaa. Plus I'm O positive…positively disgusting! I also have a very bad after taste like diet coke, except worse. My secret vampire nick name is diet Sakura. If that doesn't bother you then you might want to know that that rhyme about beans was actually originally about me.

Sakura, Sakura the horrible fruit, the more you drink the more you toot.

Yup that's me. Tooty ol Sakura.

After I made sure there were no bats in the cave and my face was free of any marker, I returned to the dining room. Sasuke stood as I entered the room as well as two other men whom I presumed to be his father and brother. Both were quite handsome though not as much as Sasuke in my opinion but to each their own.

Sasuke pulled out a chair that was across from his for me to sit in then returned to his own chair. Oh how gentlemanly. I might just jump his bones right here right now. Screw families dinners I'll just have desert aka Sasuke.

Before I can follow through all the men stand up from their seats leaving me looking a fool. Not that looking a fool is anything new to me. Nope. Most definitely not new. Looking around the dining room I spot the most beautiful woman being escorted to her chair by Sasuke's father. She must be his mother and Sasuke must be a girl because he is the spitting image of her.

Omylanta! I am a lesbian! How did I not know? Blasts, it was that face. What I wouldn't do for that face. This explains why they we staring at me, it all makes perfect sense now. They must have found out there darling daughter, princess of the vampires, Sasuke is a fruit cake when she brought me to diner! Way to go Sasugay! Making me part of your wardrobe so you can come out of the closet.

I know I'm a genius. Only an extremely gifted and talented person such as myself could have figured it out.

Insert a round of applause here.

Once Sasuke's mom sits down all the men sit down as well. Now I know who wears the trousers in the family. Here's a hint, its Sasuke's mom. There I sit mouth all open and looking stupid as ever. My stupidity doesn't seem to bother Sasuke's mom though. She doesn't waist a breath rushing right over to me and giving me a hug.

Is it a bad thing when you almost mistake your boy friend's mother for your boy friend? I mean I nearly squeezed her ass! Good thing I have self control.

"Excuse me dear," Sasuke's mom interrupts "but your hand is on my butt."

Damn these hands! I wanted to cop a feel tonight but it wasn't supposed to be Sasuke's mother! Well the good thing is now I know that Sasuke's mom doesn't wear the pants in the family. From what I could tell she was definitely not wearing any trousers under that dress or underwear to be exact.

Sasuke's mom is a total MILF.

She must know it too because once again my lack of social skills don't seem to even phase her. She only puts her own hands on my butt and gives a few firm squeezes. Once again I have to remind myself that this is Sasuke's mother and I don't enjoy it.

"You teenagers and your unusual greetings," She says with a laugh as she sits down in her chair. "is that how you and sasuke met?"

Uah…

"That reminds me of how I met your father Sasuke! Oh very similar only it was the other end if you know wha-". Before she could get another word in an extremely pink Sasuke and Fugaku start up new conversations about football.

Ahahaha I know exactly what the other end is Xo.

The rest of dinner much to Sasuke's dismay, was filled with stories about naked baby sasuke and funny stories that I couldn't imagine Sasuke having done. I don't know why I was dreading coming to meet them they were absolutely wonderful.

After dinner we sit around and talked about me. It's pretty great because I love me. They ask me questions and questions about where I'm from, who my parents are, what are my interests and hobbies. They laugh at my cheesy jokes. They are interested in what I have to say. I feel like they got me confused with George Clooney or something. He is such a charmer. Swoon.

After that sasuke declares that they have harassed me enough and that he would be taking me home. As if I'm floating on a cloud I bid Fugaku and Masaki good night and follow sasuke out of the house. As soon as my feet touch the porch sasuke has me in his arms and against the wall.

I feel drunk. My cheeks are burning. My stomach is doing flips and I can't breathe. That doesn't matter though because Sasuke is breathing for us both.

It doesn't matter that I'm making out with a boy on the said boys porch. It doesn't matter that my heart is about to burst. It doesn't matter. Nothing else matter except for sasuke touching me. His lips on my neck, my lips, that spot right behind the ear. Dear god yes.

His hands are pushing and pulling on my hips. I can't stop. They move across my hips to my stomach, tickling the sensitive skin. Then they are rubbing up and down my arms. I can't think. They glide over my clavicle, up my neck and into my hair. I can't speak. I want him so bad.

He stops.

Completely stops.

He stops doing that thing he was doing with his mouth and oh God his hands, just lets me go and steps back.

What a fucking tease.

Getting me all hot and bothered like that then you just stop?

Just as I was about to close the distance between us, Sasuke grabs my shoulders, smiles and shakes his head.

"If I don't stop, I won't be able to stop", He says.

I don't want you to stop.

"I want my first time to be special and I want it to be with you but I think you deserve more than my parents front porch or the back seat of my car because if we continued that's as far as I can make it." He continues.

I wouldn't even have made it to the car.

I wouldn't even have made it off the wall.

But I don't say that. I am actually at a loss of words at his sincerity and innocents so I just pull him into a hug and try and let the after affects of the drug called sasuke wear off before he takes me home.

It doesn't.


End file.
